Why do you love your Bae?

There was a Reason I Loved Her

The train whistled as the men and women got in. A group of young men and old men huddled together in the first class compartment as the train left Kalka station. It was filled with couples, some going for their first honeymoon. After the hot dusty weather in plains, it was time to relax in the hills of Shimla and feel youth and beauty again.

There was Mr. Kumar with his long trousers, jacket and a curly white moustache. Travelling to Shimla was fun. It would beat the heat of May. There were a group of half a dozen greying and balding men with their spouses. Each had a story with them. The old men spoke of their young days, how they had loved. Mr. Longjones, a snobby man in his sixties, was Mr. Kumar’s associate. People took care to stay away from him.  The morning ride to Shimla was full. Mr. Kumar and Mr. Longjones talked about their older times.

With the lads, the furore of ages dawning on their youths was expressed in their behaviour, attire and their hair styles. However there was this young lad looking grim, sitting beside the window all alone by himself. He had a faraway dreamy look in his eyes. He seemed brooding over something.

 “The society has degraded so much,” Mr. Longjones was telling Mr. Kumar. “These kids do not even know how to love. Romance is dead these days. These days you get live-in-relationships. So strange. Try and test, and then stay or leave depending upon the level of your compatibility. Ha, what nonsense!”

“Hmm. I agree. People have grown to be selfish and seek their own benefit first. How can they love that way?” Mr. Kumar looked at the young couple sitting next to him, “You tell me. Why do you love your bae?”

It was apparent they were unmarried and in a relationship. The young couple (Raju and Sangita) seemed embarrassed at the sudden query.

“Well,” said Raju. “We have been in a relationship for more than five years. We can’t live without each other. And you want to know the reason I love her. Well, it’s her pretty smile that I fell for.”

Mr. Longjones turned to the old couple, Mr. and Mrs. Ramon seated next to him. “Why do you love your spouse?”

Mr. Ramon made a smug face, as if remembering the old days.

“She had an awesome figure. I loved her figure. But those were old days; what is the reason that I love her now? Her awesome figure didn’t last long. In this temporary world if we seek temporary satisfaction, we won’t get permanent happiness. Why do we love our bae and to what extent can we go to show or express our love, makes an interesting question.

“Love comes in many forms. Some are strange, some exquisite. But all have a common thing. Attraction! This attraction is something which is beyond science. No matter how much logic anyone will use, in matters of heart they are bound to fail. We do not know entirely why and with whom we will fall in love.”

“Love has been more of a nuisance to the intelligence and evolution of man’s genius. Loves dulls reasoning. But yet, it is more important than the individual self. Propagation of the species is more important than individual survival.” Mr. Kumar added.

“I tell you, if you have a darn reason to love somebody, then it’s the selfishness on your part. True love is unconditional. There is no reason for love. If you love a girl for her beauty, and if her beauty is gone, will your love stay?” Mr. Longjones said excitedly.

Mr. Ramon contemplated, “Some people think love should be without a reason. And they are right. If you have a reason to love someone, and if the reason changes then maybe love fades.”

The old man smacked his lips. “Can anyone love better than us? We had an era of romance. It took days of poetry writing and wooing, when finally a girl would say “yes”. I tell you young lad; that was the finest period of our lives. Each moment was filled with excitement, whether our proposal would be accepted or rejected. With so many suitors, we had to face stiff competition among ourselves. But once the girl accepted the proposal, things became normal. The excitement gone, all was left was you and her, and a bit of love. Those were the wonderful old days.”

“Love for me has been different. Mine was an arranged marriage.” Mr. Kumar said. “I grew to love my wife with time.

“Each day, if you care for someone, the care adds up. Drop by drop love happens when we finally notice it. It takes time to fall in love, but when that happens, it’s everlasting. And when love has a sound base, that is based on mutual respect and caring, that love triumphs.  Love is gradual and love is patient. Did I have reason to love her? Little things add up to make love. And those little things add up subconsciously to the memories in the limbic system. Love emanates from our emotions and actions. There will be higher effect of emotions in those who are burdened with life after death.”

Mr. Longjones held Mr. Kumar’s hand gently, “Who has brought life and death in this world will relieve you of your pain. You have been bereaved from your spouse, and so have I. We can understand each other’s pain. I feel Emily in the wind that blows, I feel her scent. I can feel her when I stand by the door of the train, as if she has spread her hair on my face. There may not be a reason for everything. And there may be a reason. But who cares, when you love your bae forever?”

“Forever is not a word. It is an ‘emotion’.” The gloomy lad spoke for the first time. “We all want this ‘forever’ to last forever.”

The young lad looked down from the train at the riverine below.

“Hey young man, are you going to Shimla all alone? Did your bae leave you or something?” Mr. Longjones asked.

The young lad just sadly smiled. “I travel alone. Yes, she left me alone!”

“I loved my girl for a reason.” He said. “She was the first girl I kissed. She was the first girl I hugged. I left a part of my soul, when I hugged her.

“Ha! But I have loved a girl for a reason. I had been a virgin all my life. I never even kissed anyone, except for children (entirely non-sexual). And then I met her in the railway station selling roses. She was just like any other girl next door. It began with little fights for I was mocking the beautiful flowers she was selling. She said she hated me. And I said, so did I. We quarrelled like cats and dogs. Don’t know, whence this love feeling sprouted. Well, the reason I loved her was, she was the first girl I kissed. She was the first girl I hugged. No matter what, how many girls I hug or kiss, the first hug and kiss will be remembered forever! Its imprint will stay in my mind forever. No one can change that. Not even God. I left my soul in her. Today as I see back, I can still feel that hug. Nowhere (as I seek her) can I find a replacement of that hug and kiss! Do you want me to reason? Yes, I reason. I have a reason to love her. I seek for the same hug and kiss. I have been craving ever since. Seeking my love again when I felt her soul for the first time in the empty compartment of a passenger train. Who can bring it back? I have felt the need. I have felt her need.

“I wanted to marry her. Well, it was not my fault or her fault. It was just that God hadn’t willed us to be together.  You see the riverine down in the valley. She is buried there. After her death, I tried seeking love in other girls. But no matter how much I hugged, kissed or made love, I couldn’t replicate the peace and satisfaction of my first hug and kiss.

“There she lies buried all alone. She is a liar. She promised me not to desert me ever. But she has cheated me. She is in peace, and here I roam the world as a restless spirit.”

A cold gust of draught blew inside the train from the open door. The people in the train were awed by his talk. The old man gulped a sip of water from his translucent blue bottle.

“You said there should be no reason to love a person. But it needn’t be. If there’s a reason to love someone, and the reason is absolute, love will stay forever. My first kiss will always be my first kiss. No amount of kissing can change that. My first love will always be unique.”

“Did you fall in love just by her kiss?” Mr. Ramon asked.

“I did. I felt the warmth of her soul.”

The train had reached the peak. It felt uneasy to watch the valley below. It was so steep. Wonder how the railway workers had laid the track!

The train entered the tunnel the next moment. Someone had switched off the lights earlier to experience the darkness of the tunnel and scream out loud. However with the turn of events, the screams that followed were more of horror and less of excitement.

 It was pretty dark inside the train, apart from the usual dim cell phone lights; one or two were busy scrolling the social media.

When the train emerged out of the tunnel, the boy had disappeared. The old man seated next to him gasped. “I think, I saw him leap out of the window,” he shouted aghast.

 Someone searched to see, if he went to the toilet. The TTE was nowhere to be found. Someone had to report the incident. The boy couldn’t simply disappear into thin air. He must have jumped out of the window whilst the train was in the tunnel.

When the train reached next station, Mr. Longjones along with others decided to make an official complaint. When they told the station master about the incident, he looked grim.

“Calm down, gentlemen. Let me tell you a story.” He said.

“A boy from this town loved a girl who lived in the plains below. This girl used to sell roses to the passengers in the train, when it halted at the station. The boy once travelling in this train saw her and took a fancy for the girl. And instead of discharging his duties he frequently travelled up and down the stations just to meet the girl. It was unfortunate accident, that one day while she was getting off from the moving train after giving the boy a bouquet of roses, she slipped and fell. Her head came under the wheels, and she died. The boy thought it was his fault. And he couldn’t live with the guilt. He would frequently travel to visit her grave. But after a while, it looked he had lost interest in his life. His parents decided to get him married. But before that, while returning from his lover’s grave, he jumped from the moving train into the ridge. That’s what I heard. His body was not found.”

Mr. Longjones’ and his company couldn’t believe their ears. The station-master told everyone to follow him. He led them to a room, and there on the wall was the portrait of the boy. They all gasped in amazement.

“I believe you have seen him,” said the station master, in tears. “He disappeared from the train 5 years ago. He visits me each year on the day he vanished to punish me for refusing him to let him marry the girl of his choice. Each year on this day, I book a ticket in his name from Kalka to Shimla hoping that he will come back to me. He is my son.”